Why is it that at THIS time of year we are loving, kind, generous, supportive, happy, friendly and warm-hearted? Why not embrace these traits all year long?

Recently I was asked to say “something” at a holiday party. As I thought about what I would like to say, I thought about what message people will carry with them not only at this time of year, but hopefully throughout the entire year.

I decided to make a list of twelve gift ideas which hopefully people will give ALL YEAR long. Most importantly, these gifts cost no money and will give you as much as they give the recipient.

Here is my list:

1. Give the gift of LOVE. Start by loving yourself. Realize that you are perfect just the way you are. Find at least 3 positive things about yourself every day, and remember to tell them to yourself, preferably out loud. Then, spread that love to others including friends, family and most of all, strangers.

2. Give the gift of SURPRISE. Do something special for someone on the spur of the moment. I think the best gifts are those that are the least expected. I was at a birthday celebration dinner last night with my family at their favorite restaurant. As I stood to go to the bathroom, I realized that everyone had a wonderful evening and that a special surprise would be for me to not only treat the birthday “girl” (who was thrilled to turn 65 and be on Medicare!) but to treat everyone since they didn’t expect it and they had enjoyed THEIR favorite place. It was a gift given with love and with the intention to make them happy, which they were throughout the evening and even happier with this special surprise.

3. Give the gift of YOUR PRESENCE. Visit someone who you don’t see often. If visiting is impossible, call or jot the person a lovely note reminding him or her how much they mean to you. Giving of your time is usually more important than giving an object. Take the time to find someone who does not have the family or friends to be with and make that person feel special by you acknowledging him or her.

4. Give the gift of WARMTH. Smile everywhere you go at everyone you meet. It will warm your heart as well as the recipient of your smile.

5. Give the gift of PATIENCE. Open the door for the person who may move a little slower than you; offer to return a shopping cart for someone who may otherwise find that chore a challenge; listen with love in your heart as someone stutters as they tell a story; walk at the pace of the child who is beside you rather than expecting that child to run to keep your pace; repeat yourself two, three or four times with love in your heart as someone asks you to repeat your words when they weren’t heard; make pleasant conversation with the stranger next to you as you wait in a long line at a store and thank the clerk for THEIR patience in helping you with all that you need.

6. Give the gift of CARING. Find someone who has less than you and be certain to include that person on your gift list. There are so many ways to give at this time of year- Toys for Tots; CASA has children’s names on trees at the grocery store for whom to supply a gift; food banks are asking for food and monetary donations; organizations are visibly collecting cell phones to sell to raise funds to supply our soldiers with phone cards; and many more. Yes, give as much as you can. But remember these people need ALL year so try to give throughout the year when these needs may be less apparent due to less publicity. I always try to donate money or food to a food bank which is equal to the holiday meal I will enjoy. I try to shop for children by pretending my child is still young and purchasing for children-in-need what I think my son would love if he was still that age. I try to embrace the values that I learned by watching my parents volunteer to feed the homeless or work as a volunteer at a library and volunteer my time whenever possible.

7. Give the gift of KINDNESS. Take a moment to thank your postal carrier. Thank the grocery clerk. Smile and wish the clerk at the post office a pleasant day. They’re dealing with people all day long, some who aren’t so pleasant, so be that special customer who wishes that person a nice day or a happy holiday. Offer to run an errand for a neighbor who may be less mobile than you. While at the grocery, picking up a ½ gallon of milk for an elderly neighbor takes only a second but could make the difference between that person having it or not. Offer to help even if you are not asked. Many of us find it challenging to ask for help, but when offered, we are grateful for it.

8. Give the gift of JOY. Be pleasant and happy and fun so that others will catch your spirit.

9. Give the gift of being POSITIVE. Everything happens for a reason, so embrace the positive of any challenge and be grateful for all that is wonderful in your life. Help others to see the positive in every situation. If you are stuck in traffic, it may be that an accident occurred and had you been ahead of where you are, you could have been involved. If you are running late, it is because you are exactly where you are supposed to be, when you are supposed to be there. If you are earning less income or making less on your investments, it will allow you to focus on the important things in life that don’t cost you money. Focus on ALL that you do have, rather than what you don’t have or what you think you should have.

10. Give the gift of being an INSPIRATION. Act, speak and be the change you want to see (yes, I’m borrowing and modifying Gandhi’s words). Others observe you and we all learn from each other. Be a positive and inspirational role model for all whose path you cross. I always like to treat others as I would like to be treated.

11. Give the gift of UNDERSTANDING. Understand that someone who is angry or sad or not contacting you may be hurt and needing your love and support. Offer that love and support unconditionally by being a soft place for that person to “fall”. Understand that person may need time and space to work through a challenge in his or her life. Understand that by being loving, if only in your heart, the Universe will surround that person with your love. Understand that people do not change, you need to change your expectations. Understand that the holidays, as at other times of the year, people remember and mourn those who have passed, people may be too far away to visit, people may be too caught up in the commercialism of this season or in their jobs or any number of things that keep him or her from being available to you. This may even be how someone else views you. Perhaps YOU are the unavailable one and others need to be understanding of you. BREATHE A LOT. Allow yourself to feel and to experience the emotion while being gentle with yourself and continuing to surround the situation with love.

Last, but in my opinion, one of the most important gifts is-

12. Give the gift of ACCEPTANCE. Find someone who looks or talks or walks or hears or loves differently than you. Honor that person’s differences. Be sure to tell others how important that person is to you and how meaningful their existence is to the World. Many of us are at social functions at this time of year with the perfect opportunity to help others to embrace others who are different by telling stories of our same-sex neighbors and their involvement with the community, their helpfulness, their love, or the warmth with which they are raising their children, walking their dog or being a helpful neighbor. Many of us have friends or family who are a different color or different nationality or different religion than we are. Share with others how we ALL contribute to make this a loving and peaceful planet. This is one of the greatest gifts you can give. When people respect you, they respect your opinion and your experience with others. Share the positive message of accepting all humans in your life. We are ALL connected.

During this holiday season, as always, I give you the gifts of love, light, peace, happiness, joy, wisdom, health, abundance, gratefulness, sincerity, and all that you want and need as we join together to create a more loving, peaceful and accepting Universe.

Enjoy the holiday season.

Embrace Nature and all of her wondrous glory- the glint of the sparkling snow, the glimmer of the rain watering the trees and plants, the birds singing or, as I have experienced recently, a group of deer grazing on a tree or a family of javelina crossing the road!

I know I am blessed and I know you are also.

Much love, light, health and happiness in your life,
Susan Faith